"When you recognize that failing doesn't make you a failure, you give yourself permission to try all sorts of things." - Lauren Fleshman
This quote showed up on the top of this week's calendar in my Believe Training Journal, where I track my miles, workouts, and paces each week. It couldn't have come at a better time. I'm half way through what has been a very rough training cycle with lofty goals. I've failed so many times. Just this past weekend, a 19 miler that would incorporate 7 miles of goal marathon pace miles turned into a very difficult 7 mile run that ended with me holding back tears and then walking (yes, walking) the 2.5 miles home from where I called it quits. I didn't even try to run home.
I can't continue to blame the heat for my poor performance. I've been running in this weather for almost 8 weeks now. It feels like my body just doesn't want to be doing what I want it too. I'm working through it to figure out if there is a deeper issue or if I'm just in a running funk and need some time off. In the meantime, I just have to keep training.
Week 8 Schedule:
Monday: 5.5 miles (AM) + 4.5 miles (PM) + yoga
Tuesday: 9 miles - track/VO2 Max Run (6 x 600m @ 6:00 pace) + weights
Wednesday: 10 mile progression (8:30 down to 7:00) + yoga
Thursday: 5 recovery miles + 10 x strides + kettle bell
Saturday: 16 miles w/ 7 @ GMP
The long run will be a cut back for me (not really since I didn't actually run 19 miles this past week), but it will incorporate marathon pace miles. I'll be starting my track workouts on Tuesday, and I'm interested to see how that goes. Temps are supposed to be in the 90's for a majority of the week which will not be fun, and I have to do track workouts after work because it isn't open early enough for me to go before. I'm trying to think positive thoughts right now though. The first track workout is always a little shaky for me, so I'm not expecting perfection. Failing at it is better than not trying.
After my horrific attempt at 19 miles on Saturday, I just wanted to do a hard 12 mile run to make up the miles and pace I missed out on. Runner mentality always leads me there. Instead, Peter convinced me to take it to the trails, work some different muscles, and get my mind off the paces I wasn't hitting. I protested a bit because I wanted to watch the Women's Olympic Marathon that was airing at 5:30 am, but he said if I didn't go, I would be out on the 12 mile run during the race and couldn't watch it anyways. Good point.
We went to Hellman Park in Whittier. It's a 6 mile or so loop of trails with lots of climbing and unbearable (at times) hills. I worked hard, forgot to stop my watch a few times, and was still impressed with my pace given the 1,000+ feet of elevation gain. I'm a concrete, flat, beach runner, so yes, 1,000 feet is a lot of elevation for me!
When I woke up this morning, my glutes and ankles were sore, but I felt more motivated to work hard this week and made it out of bed for my run this morning. I'm looking forward to some more trails with the Long Beach Running Club tonight as part of my double run day.
How do you work through running (or life) failures?
Do you incorporate trails in your training?